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A young teacher who wanted her life to be perfect became determined to kill herself after employment opportunities dried up and she was diagnosed with depression, an inquest heard.
‘High achiever’ Lauren Peck was a ‘bubbly, fun-loving’ 25-year-old but she hid the true extent of her feelings from family, friends and doctors while researching methods of suicide on the internet.
The talented artist and pianist descended deeper into despair as her life and teaching career failed to turn out how she had hoped, an inquest into her death heard.
And being told she was struggling to cope was proof she was a ‘failure’, leading to her suicide.
Miss Peck killed herself on the day teachers and pupils were returning to school after the summer holidays.
She inhaled gas and suffocated herself in her bedroom at her parent’s home.
Next to her lifeless body was a note listing her perceived deficiencies in which she claimed to have ‘failed as a teacher, a daughter and a friend’.
Miss Peck’s father Martin said: ‘Lauren had gone through school and college and had always been good at everything she did.
‘It’s so sad, because she wanted to be perfect at everything and obviously she felt she’d fallen short. But to us she was perfect.’
Police investigating the death found emails and text messages which showed the purchase of the gas was a ‘plan B’ after she was stopped from buying cyanide on the internet.
Just three weeks earlier she had been discharged from a psychiatric unit after being spotted near a railway line and admitted she was suicidal.
It was the second time she had been seen near train tracks contemplating killing herself – on the first occasion she told officers she was distraught after being ‘knocked back’ for a number of jobs.
Her father said his daughter loved art and ‘blossomed’ while studying at sixth form. He said she was normally a ‘lively, party girl’ with a good set of friends.
After studying textiles at the University of Leeds she took a teaching qualification and at the end of 2013 moved back to Glossop, Derbyshire, where she had grown up.
But her artist mother Brenda Peck told the inquest her daughter became concerned when the supply teaching jobs started ‘drying up’. She also found working with special needs children ‘stressful’.
‘I tried to reassure that in time she would get her chance. I told her she just had to stick with it,’ Mrs Peck said.
Chesterfield Coroner’s Court heard friends became increasingly worried by Miss Peck’s behaviour. In May 2015 she suffered panic attacks, took an overdose and started self-harming.