Relationship And Sex

6 Suggestive Random Fights To Try When You Feel Like Testing The Strength Of Your Relationship

This post shared by Cora Martin, a student and aspiring writer,are you trying to test the strength of your relationship?It might sound crazy the way the author had stated her points but you can still grab an idea.Apply caution lolRead Also: 9 Important Things Men Want In Marriage

Let’s examine what the author has to say.

Sure, it might theoretically be nice to be with someone whose default is to love and support you, and who generally takes you for your word, but truthfully, if you’re not fighting at all, you’re not passionate.

What in the world? Is this how we define a healthy relationship in 2018?

But I can think of a million reasons to fight with your partner other than as a means to come closer to each other as a couple, but I’m just going to name one: to see how much you can get away with.

Again, if a man wrote this, no woman would let him hear the end of it. This already sounds like the foundations for an abusive relationship.

Being a psycho girlfriend is a unique kind of power that says A) you have absolute control over your happiness, even the happiness that comes from another person, and B) you’re pretty. When your boyfriend lets you get away with some next level crazy girl shit, he’s essentially saying that you’re pretty and he loves you. And sometimes you need to hear those things by any means necessary. So if you’re in a pinch, you should have some go-to fights to start, just for fun!

Now for a closer look at the author’s fights of choice.

1. The “Go Have Fun With Your Friends” Fight

This one has been around since your mother was manipulating your father in the early ‘90s and it’s a simple as it sounds.

The first red flag is that she promotes this type of fighting after recognizing it as a tool for manipulation. So how does it work?

You can either tell him “go have fun with your friends,” kiss him goodbye, and give yourself a beauty night. OR you can say “go have fun with your friends,” kiss him goodbye, and secretly harbor resentment for him all evening, watch his snap story 17 times, and let the rage build for hours until he comes home, at which time you release your inner banshee as he slowly welcomes death.

Okay, promoting passive-aggressive behaviors. What’s next?

This one is fun because it keeps him on his toes, and unless he’s very attentive, he won’t ever really know what you mean when he leaves the house. Don’t overuse it though — the surprise is half the fun.

Hmm. So we should not only manipulate our boyfriends, but do it solely for the “fun” of it. Sounds like a good idea.

2. The “I Don’t Know What I Want To Eat, But I Don’t Like Any Of Your Suggestions” Fight

All you have to do is be of absolutely 0.0 help when he asks what you want to eat and then moodily shoot down everything he comes up with. From there, get annoyed with him for even thinking you’d want Italian tonight when he knows you’re low carb this week, and how dare he suggest tacos down the street — you just ate there, and it’s like he never wants to take you anyplace nice. Be sure to act like a completely changed, sweet, and loving woman once you’re fed, and to blame your attitude on being hangry.

More manipulation! Have a meltdown and blame it on the terrible crisis of hanger!

3. The “Talk Too Much About Your Sex Life” Fight

He knows you talk about your sex life with your friends, but he doesn’t know that your squad could describe his penis in alarming detail to a sketch artist if it went missing. Let him know! Let him know that the intimate details of his life that he thought were private between the two of you were actually a public service announcement the next day at brunch.

Ever heard of “don’t kiss and tell?” This is beyond screwed up.

This is a fun switch because it actually feels like he is starting the fight, because he’s the one who got butthurt, but as long as you refuse acknowledge your wrongdoing throughout, and he still loves you by the end of it, you win.

After starting the fight, you’re then supposed to make him feel guilty for getting angry. It’s not like he should have expected that information to remain private, right?

4. The “Wedding Board” Fight

Show him your wedding boards on Pinterest. This is already one level of crazy, but I implore you to take it up a notch. Pin some things you know he’ll hate, and then get upset with him for not liking your dream wedding. Tell him all of his ideas are stupid and that it’s not even fair for him to have an opinion on this because you obviously care much more about your wedding than he does.

Why would any guy stay with a girl who does this? You would have to totally destroy a guy’s self esteem to convince that he’s stupid and not allowed to have an opinion on something that directly involves him.

The goal is to get so into this argument that he forgets you’re not even engaged yet.

Hopefully, at this point he’s beginning to see that they don’t need to be engaged.

5. The “Whiskey Dick” Fight

As the name implies, it happens because of whiskey or other alcohol, and not because your boyfriend isn’t interested in you or in getting an erection. I know this. You know this. He knows this. But he doesn’t know you know this. It’s a secret women have kept since the beginning of time for when we want our boyfriends to apologize to us, even when they haven’t really done anything wrong. You know the drill.

More guilt tactics…

When things start to get hot and heavy, but there’s no movement in his downstairs area, just start to get upset about it. Maybe cry! “Is this my fault? Why aren’t you attracted to me? Is it someone else?” Then reap the benefits of some non-reciprocal cunnilingus and possibly the brunch of your choosing come morning.

I don’t even know what to say to this.

6. The “You Didn’t Like My Instagram Photo” Fight

If done correctly, you can actually make this seem like it’s something bigger than a social media double tap. He knows how hard you’ve been working on your aesthetic, and yet, he can’t be bothered to do this ONE little thing for you? You do everything you can to support him in everything he does and it’s just starting to feel like this relationship is very one-sided.

Ugh. This is, fortunately, her last recommended “fight”.

At the end of the article, readers are treated to the author’s biography, which is filled with even more ridiculousness.

V is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring — so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it’s not there at all. V has since been fulfilling her duties as “America’s big,” a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays.

The fact that this is considered remotely acceptable and is given a platform on a women’s blogging site is concerning.

 I know there are definitely legitimate struggles women face due to  gender. Some women, however, have taken this to the extreme of considering themselves above respectful interaction with men. The level of hypocrisy is honestly astounding.

What’s wrong with our society today?

Manipulating and abusing your boyfriend is seen as a sign of a “strong” woman who knows her worth and prioritizes her happiness.

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