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The internet has made it comfortable for a lot to spill out darkest secret from their heart ,as I continue to post some darkest secret on here ,I hope you learn one thing or the other.But honestly some of these secrets are best shared to relieve one of the burden of carrying it around.Read Also: Read Story Of Woman Who Haven’t Had Sex For 7 years(See How She Feels)
I’m a 32 year old married man and I work for a large multinational in a relatively senior position. A few years ago, I needed a senior analyst on my team and we’d been searching for the right candidate for over 3 months now. It is a very niche field that we work in and we were finding it hard to get the right person. Ours is a super dynamic team. We got tired of looking and just hired someone who didn’t meet all of our expectations – hoping that we could train him. But the demands of that position evolved way faster than the speed at which he was learning and delivering. I really needed someone with “reliable shoulders”.
And then she came. I’m Indian-American. I was born and raised in the US but I am of Indian origin. She was Indian and had just moved to the US with her husband after studying and working in a whole bunch of foreign countries. A colleague knew her and referred her for the position. The resume seemed impressive. I met her and interviewed her. So did my team – and the decision was a unanimous yes. The woman seemed very bright. She was probably 28 or so. Let’s just call her Patty.
Sure enough, she was a high-performer. She always delivered more than she promised. Unlike many high performers, she wasn’t a jerk. She looked no older than 21 or 22 and had the most charming smile ever. She wasn’t beautiful – she was cute. Like high-school cute. But she had the maturity and brains of someone way beyond her years.
This one time, we had a major system failure and we had to deliver some critical stuff. I won’t go into the details. But in a single night, she manually calculated some super complex stuff that we had NEVER imagined could be done without our software and without the use of computers. She was at office all night and filled up whiteboard after whiteboard and the genius that she was, by morning, we had what we needed to deliver.
I was around and so was most of my team that night – but she was the biggest contributor. We thanked her. She received a special award and lots of appreciation etc.
A few months later, we had to go to a conference in Hawaii. There was more than 50 of us I guess. Patty and I had to present some fairly important stuff on one of the conference days. Two days before the presentation, we had a major power failure in the hotel. They turned on the generators but the fault was major and after running the generators for almost a day maybe, the hotel announced that they’d have to shut down electricity in the lobby and in certain areas and only the rooms would have full electricity – till the issue was resolved.
We needed to work on our deliverables and tried doing it in one of the many coffee shops in the resort – it still had power. But it was hard. The place was noisy and we really needed some quiet. We considered going to another cafe or restaurant – outside the resort to use their WiFi – but the weather was terrible. We tried using our phone’s hotspot but it wasn’t fast enough. We decided the best way was just to go to one of our rooms and finish it – where the WiFi worked.
I went to hers. And we were done with our presentation in a few hours. As usual, she had some great ideas and was at her best. When we were done, it was late in the evening. We were sitting at the study table in her room. The balcony door was open and we could see the ocean. It was a beautiful resort and the view was beautiful and we were both feeling relaxed since we were done with work.
I was right next to her on the chair and our eyes met when I had said thank you and she said “no problem”. And then we couldn’t look away. I have brownish-green eyes, a very unlikely eye color for an Indian (I get them from my dad who’s super fair). So I think she was probably looking at them and wondering the same thing – why I had the weird color maybe. I, however, was stuck on hers because they were large jet black eyes on her extremely fair face. Her eyes were large, round and innocent. We stared into each other’s eyes for what seemed like forever and moved a little closer. Our noses brushed and I gently kissed her. She was hesitant at first but she kissed me back. She gently grabbed my shirt sleeve and I held her little face in my hands and it was the most beautiful, gentle and deep kiss I’ve ever had. I’m kind of tall – about 6′3 and she was maybe 5′5 or so. So it got kind of weird once we got up from our chairs. I was too tall for her.
I lifted her up and made her stand on the bed (the bed was fairly low) and then we were fine. Her neck smelled like a cute fruit (she was wearing a nice perfume) and her lips tasted sweet. She was smooth as silk – her skin and her hair, and she was so slender and fragile. Her hands in my hair felt amazing. This went on for maybe half an hour or so and I knew I wanted to go all the way. But a lot of things went through my mind – and I decided that I couldn’t. We had no protection to use and I just didn’t want to risk getting her pregnant or something. She was so cute and smart and I just wanted to love her so much – but at the same time I felt “protective” towards her. I just didn’t want to do anything that could create a major mess. We were both married to other people and I just became very aware of this at one point. At one point, she reached for my belt and tried to undo it – but then she suddenly stopped. She just hugged me real tight and then moved back and said “I think we need to stop”. Her face was all pink and her cheeks were completely flushed. I looked at her and gave her a huge hug, kissed her on the forehead and said “Yes, we need to stop.” So we stopped and no – we did not sleep with each other.
I just held her in my arms for so long – it was like we both knew we were never doing this again. It felt like it was a “bye”.
I didn’t want any awkwardness between us – we worked together and would have to see each other every day. So I said “I just don’t know if we should……” She finished my sentence, “We shouldn’t ever do this again.”
“Yes….we shouldn’t,” I said as I looked into her eyes.
She smiled, hugged me and kissed me on the side of my neck. We just stepped out of the room then and had dinner together that day.
We never discussed this after that day. At work, we are very professional with each other. I feel like we’re even more formal with each other than we were before. We respect each other, look out for each other and we’re still a very high performing team.
As I had said earlier, I was already married and so was she. I do love my wife a lot – I really do. And I know Patty loves her husband. I’m just not the kind of man who ever imagined having an affair and Patty isn’t that kind of lady either. I guess we just spent so much time around each other at work, there was probably this underlying attraction between the two of us and we’d never consciously thought of it. It just surfaced when we had the chance to let it surface.
I’m glad we didn’t go all the way and stopped where we did. And I’m happy with how we dealt with it. What I felt with her that day was more intense than anything I’ve ever felt while sleeping with a lady. My attraction towards her wasn’t physical – it wasn’t her body I was attracted to. I think I liked her smartness. I also just felt very protective towards her – which was something I’d felt ever since she’d joined us.
I do know we shouldn’t have done what we did – but we’re never doing it again. I’m always going to treat my wife with love and care (like I’ve always done) and I know Patty’s going to do the same for her husband. I’ve met him and he’s a great guy. I have no regrets being married to my wife. She doesn’t have any either. I’ll be honest – I also don’t regret what happened between Patty and me. I know it wasn’t right but I don’t regret it. It was beautiful and I’ve just never felt anything even close to it in my entire life. Yes, you can feel that way for someone without having to sleep with them. And that is the most amazing feeling ever.